As I look
back over my life fashion has lurked behind the lack of self-love. The more I
found love of self, the more I Expressed, Accentuated, and Created from the
inside out. We express. We accentuate. We create. I remember the days I hid behind
the baggy polo shirts, jeans, and tennis shoes. I was sad. I was overworked. I
was lost in the world of adulthood as a child. But I always smiled. Its amazing
how someone’s smile never tells the whole story. My dad had a beautiful
smile….yeah I think I have his smile. We lived lives separate of each other but
I think our smiles kept us connected. His life certainly was no crystal stair
as he struggled with addictions and incarcerations. But He smiled. Me and my
sister use to always laugh and make fun of his cut off jean shorts and v-neck
white T’s. I wanted us to wear more than
just a painted smile. I wanted to own what took place on the inside of me and
feel pretty like the other girls who were “most popular” or “best dressed”. I
did make the leadership team though and found my niche as a class officer and
student council representative. JROTC
was my staple identity. I would have worn that uniform everyday if it was
accepted. Shinning my brass and my shoes, earning my ribbons and medals gave me
pride. It gave me purpose. It gave me….a shield. I was not ready to explore my
body, my features, my attributes in a way that fashion required. I did not know
who I was, so I certainly did not know what to wear. So many women never find
who they are and as a result what they wear is not a true reflection of who
they are. You know when a woman loves herself as she so effortlessly graces
your presence with a style that breaks limits, set standards, and captures the
hearts of many.
I knew I was
changing when my fashion changed. My hair changed. My health changed. People
noticed this change and as they pointed out what was taking place, my heart
melted as I knew what it was like not to be there…not to care. I now stand
naked in the mirror and smile and notice the change of every mole or blemish. I
can stand the sight of a camera (within reason.lol.) for I have nothing to be
ashamed of. I express. I accentuate. I create. As I learn to take professional
risks…I learn to play with the color of my wardrobe. As I learn to forgive…I
learn to clash patterns and materials. As I let go…I permission myself to shop.
As I grow…my accessories become more risky. As I love…my shoes take me places I
never could have imagined. I knew I was changing when my fashion changed.
Change is definitely in the air ladies, and im glad about it.
We express.
We Accentuate. We create. My prayer is
that every woman finds fashion because when she finds fashion I know she has
found herself.
Until Next
Time Ladies,
Draw from
Here, Drink from Here, Quench your thirst Here@ Wednesday WELLness
Signed,
Miss Ebony
