Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Booty


Ive never really been opinionated regarding the impact on music in todays society. I remain fairly neutral agreeing that it is a political movement of influence while also believing as individuals/families/communities we have to put all things into its proper perspective taking in what we can handle and leaving the rest for the taking.

Mmmm… if I had to label my movement I would consider myself a liberal feminist. I share a radical belief that all women should find their truth, their beauty and be liberated from within but I don’t spend a lot of time boycotting groups for their lack of sensitivity to this group.

I have a confession: when the hymns subside and I hang up my professional hat I get ‘turnt up’ (is that how you say it? lol). When the rump shaking anthems blow through the speakers of my car or im at home in some form of transition I turn on the local hip hop/r&b station and let loose. My alter ego surfaces and I become a video girl/rapper having the time of my life! I don’t even have a big booty but when the right song comes on you cant convince me my twirking ability wont land me in the next remix video. Now to my defense, I do have a dancing past so my rhythmic nature is decent but honey when my imagination takes a hold of me…watch out world!

No matter who she is or what shes going through…the right song can put her right side up again. When I use to go to the club I would be astonished at the level of confidence displayed when a certain song came on. Every woman on the dance floor was her own BeyoncĂ© and she let her ‘UH OH’ do its magic. The freedom in getting caught up in the tag line while believing its just you and yours cant be accomplished through therapy or scripture memorization (don’t shoot me). This is cadenced notion is her owning it, walking in it fearlessly, with no apologies.

If I want to brighten someone’s day I pray for them, give them a cheer up greeting gift, and my favorite… bring a booty shaking song and start doing the bump until they laugh uncontrollably and gain up enough strength to shake their tale feather. To be honest I don’t know what half the songs say outside the hook but as the liberal feminist that I am I want to give a special award to Sage the Gemini for turning bootys all across the world into mans best friend.lol. “And she gon' shake it, like a red nose--Li-li-li-li-like a red nose” & to Krizz Kaliko for liking girls with big bootys-“I like a girl wit a big booty…she like to back it up and give it to me”.

Historically, our ability to move has freed us from life’s weights. From cheerleading, to drill teams, to neighborhood girl groups we continue to move and look good/feel good while doing it.

Dance competitions at family gatherings with much laughter as the different generations do their moves are amusing. Everyone cheering “Go, Go, Go, Go”!!!!!

To all the women across the world I command you to shake what yo mama gave you! There is no one booty that is the same but we all have something to proudly display as you look back at it, purk your lips, get on your tippy toes and just bounce.

 

Top 10 booty songs of my time that keep us believing we are a force to be reckoned with…now shake it!

10) “Rump Shaker” by Wrex N Effect

9) “Big Ole Butt,” LL Cool J

8 ) Ms. Fat Booty, Mos Def

7) “The Thong Song,” Sisqo

6) “Bonita Applebum,” A Tribe Called Quest

5)“Da Butt,” E. U.

4) TIE: “Fatty Girl,” Ludacris, LL Cool J and Keith Murray/”Bootylicious,” Destiny’s Child

3) Juvenile, “Back That Thang Up”

2) Mystikal, “Shake Ya A**”

1) Baby Got Back, Sir Mix-A-Lot

 

#EVENEBONY

Monday, October 28, 2013

Unmarried Sexually Active Believers...


The moment He says he is a believer and proceeds to do more than just kiss her…

 The moment she responds that she loves the Lord but is overtaken by her need to be more than just held…

At that moment they have both spiritually shattered the probability of them being just friends.

At that moment they have both spiritually shattered the probability of them being even more than just friends.

So what are they?

They are stuck between the two trying to juggle this friend thing, this boo thing, this friend thing, this boo thing, this friend thing, this boo thing…..

A brother in Christ of mine said something to me that I continue to ponder on. He said that if a true man of God cant contain himself in sexual matters…this shows his inability or unwillingness to lead his family into TRUTH. If he does not stand, then who will? I use to laugh all the time when I would say there would be no premarital sex if men wouldn’t pursue such an act.lol. Now this is a bit extreme while realizing the same would be true if women would just say no.lol.

The reality is as sexually involved believers there will be no real turn in the tide until individuals get it deep down inside that they want to honor God with their bodies at all cost. So how can we love God so much yet love sex outside of the covenant the He ordained. The spirit is indeed willing, while the flesh is weak…

My spiritual prayer is that I meet a guy who loves God so much that his containment will bring my flesh under subjection, leaving us both waiting until the time is right. Could you imagine sitting so close to him that every pulsation is secretly raging out of control as your flesh really wants him to put you out of your misery but his spirit wont budge; with the understanding that hes not gay or already banging other women? lol. Sounds like torture, but the glory that follows Im sure cant be compared J.

This is a reality for so many but no one really talks about the actual process, they just talk about the expectation.

It’s the reality of most believing women to want more but settle for less as the immediate gratification quenches the thirst of her eternal drought of longing. There is no natural “tool” long enough to scratch the spiritual love itch that she really has; yet understanding that that tool does have the power to weaken her love signal leaving her to believe this is as good as it gets for now or better yet this is what I prefer :/

I don’t have an answer or magic revelation but as a social worker I am aware that in order to tackle an epidemic the conversation must be had….

There have been many spiritual theories, shifts of personal blame, and natural circumstances that explain why sex before marriage is a reality for those of us practicing our faith and I agree with most of them J.

The good news is...even when we put the cart before the horse redemption is yet available as our hearts cry out for more all the while HE is eager to complete the puzzle.

‘Complex yet Conquerable’ is my final thought.
#EVENEBONY

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Singly Married


Singly Married
 

What fun is it being physically alone while being spiritually told what to do! You mean to tell me I gotta fall asleep unaccompanied but wake up to this still small voice giving me instructions for the day! Comb your hair baby, Those pants are too tight dear, No fast food-cook dinner, Don’t talk back-just hold your peace…..HA!...& whose grand idea was this! People all over the world raving about being single in Lord and the beauty of fellowshipping with him alone. Tuh! Did I miss the memo! Check Please…

Woosah…yes Lord I love ya but I think we both need to have a sit down cause I don’t understand why I must  go through such a rigorous training course when it appears that you have been giving half-baked couples the go for years! Ok, Ok…I’m special. One of a kind, of a special design….the person he has for me is beyond my wildest dreams. Now, that sounded perfect when I was getting my graduate degree, tapping into some emotional healing, and cleaning up some debt. Well lets face it…yeah I can get my PHD but hanging from a ceiling fan sounds more appealing. I will always be healing emotionally as a woman with many scars but I am definitely no Lynn Whitefield from A thin Line Between Love and Hate. Finally lets face it…I will be in debt indefinitely so lets just die broke together. Now that we’ve got that out of the way I must acknowledge that the time it took me to get to this point in this excerpt I have released at least 5 viable eggs with no mating opportunities. The moral: Lord we are wasting precious time here!!! *clears throat and improves posture*.

I love ya Lord, you knows I do but this Singly Married boat needs to reach its shore before I jump off and make a spectacle out of myself and You! Now, you don’t have to consider this your warning as I know you are Sovereign. You actually don’t even have to acknowledge my plea. When its all said and done I truly don’t know what I am asking you for but this we both know…you don’t escort me to the movies, you don’t pick up my dinner tab, you don’t rub my feet, but you always tell me what to do. With the exception of a few hiccups every now and then I have been a good wife to you.lol. I love ya Lord, you knows I do but can you please send me my boo : ).

 

All jokes a side…I don’t mind waiting J. This has been an interesting ride and I am sooo sooo sooo very grateful for my journey. Its just the beginning…..#EvenEbony.

 

Until Next Time…Be Easy!

Signed,

Miss Ebony

 

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Resilency

Todays Word is Resiliency...

 
Resilient: The spirit of overcoming obstacles created to destroy. Today I am grateful for the reminder that my resiliency alone makes me a champion. I sometimes forget this truth as I harbor on personal struggles, matters of the mind, issues of the heart and actions of rebellion.

My dog was recently attacked by a neighbor dog  & observing her recovery has given me a new revelation of resiliency as I witness that she is better after the attack than she was moments before it. The scar is quite an eye sore but she has her life and for that I am grateful. Although I realize that our time here on this earth is limited, I am learning not to spend time anticipating this departure but rather enjoying the stay.

I have overcome and am now enduring a season of discovering the self I never knew. Its amazing how you can live with someone 24/7 and not really know who they are.lol. As I discover self I create declarations to remind myself of my truth, laugh when I do what I said I never would, forgive myself when I seek natural fixes for spiritual matters, love more/judge less, forgive daily & pray about everything.

I am also enjoying seeing myself open up in areas that I have been closed off to in the past.  As my willingness increases the change on the inside is manifesting on the outside and I am in awe at what is taking place. My hair is now a big ol curly poof and I just slap it in a gelled up knot on top of my head while I gain enough courage to wear it out in its natural ‘lion like’ state.lol. My waist is shrinking and I am enjoying the curves becoming more defined…POW, POW, POW!lol.






There is no real purpose for this entry other than to say….EvenEbony. I have bad days, days of heaviness, and days of uncertainty but…I am here J. Oh…I saw the Color Purple Musical in Chicago last week and it gave me the breakthrough I needed. The aftermath of tears, confessions, and revelations sealed the deal. My healing process can sometimes be painful but the Glory that follows leaves me at a lost for words.

 

Signing Out,

MISS EBONY

Saturday, October 19, 2013

I am gone but I am still here...




I am gone but I am still here. You may not see me as you scroll through your newsfeed posting selfies, sharing revelations, encouraging hearts, displaying funny anecdotes, exposing charades of a single female and the like…but I am still here. I will share a few reasons for my social media departure but the substance and conviction of it all lies between an understanding between me and HE. No, facebook is not the devil and quite frankly it is used in a variety of ways by many that take businesses, personal relationships, entertainment, and declarations to the next level.

As a person who is a loner yet has a lot to say, Facebook seemed to be the better option for me regarding staying connected while fulfilling some level of purpose through encouraging self-love, self-preservation, and forgiveness of self.  Then came a season when I began to question the authenticity of it all. Did I become so high strung for being entertained and entertaining that there were two lives in which I portrayed: My Life & My facebook life? It became evident that you either knew me or you knew me on facebook. Not that there was a vast difference regarding my personality or character but my Facebook life was very filtered and targeted. It was filtered and targeted for security/safety reasons but it became more of a “what do you want them to know/see…yeah give them more of that”. So who were the “thems”. Hmmm….at any given moment I truly had no idea and this became ludacris to me.  Yes, I “knew” every one of my “friends” listed but the energy/time/effort put into keeping them “informed” seemed quite irrational. So how do you tackle that?...you limit what you post right?...Ta dah! Uh no, because then you become a ‘newsfeed scroller’ taking in the bafoonery posted as you form opinions, shake your head, laugh, turn up your brow…etc etc etc. As you create this false sense of mere entertainment facebook then becomes your life. Dinner conversations are revolved around whats on facebook, men don’t have to court you, they just create this facebook love affair, Friends don’t call they just like your picture so you know theyre there-these and other shenanigans disgusted me and I screamed: I WANT MORE! I want to live one life and share it with those I love the most. I want to know that what I look like, how I feel, & what I think need not be validated by the masses but understood and appreciated by my God and those who take the time to enter my most sacred circle. There is a world of people, entertainment, and platforms that are available to me that I can see, touch, smell & embrace; I owe myself this journey and not cheat myself by settling for social media. No, facebook is not the devil and quite frankly it is used in a variety of ways by many that take businesses, personal relationships, entertainment, and declarations to the next level. In this season I just want to try something a little different J.

It has been a few weeks and yes I feel so disconnected; I have no idea whats going on.lol. I am forced to spend my down time doing something else. I reach out to friends more often, even if just through txt. I am forced to write more and pray even more. To be who I am without sharing it with the world has allowed me to question my intentions and examine my heart. I know my deactivation was abrupt but I didn’t wanna join the “Good-bye” facebook base of people as you receive comments and inboxes begging you to stay.lol. It has been quite interesting though running into people and them asking me why I haven’t been on facebook. I have mixed feelings about those interactions but I can save that revelation for another day and maybe one day my thoughts will render another dolla.

 

Until Next Time Dear Hearts, I am gone but I am still here. #EvenEbony

Year of Yes

So Im trying to get into adding audio books to my regimen. My sister recommended that in this season of my life I should consider 'Year ...